Ten Pin Bowling, that great American sport, has to be the worst sport in the history of the world ever. Actually, scratch that, erase those words from your mind and replace them with this "Ten Pin Bowling, that great American pastime, has to be the worst pseudo-sport in the history of the world ever". The history of this activity bears witness to this. In case you were unaware, bowling started with Genghis_Khan; he used to throw the heads of his enemies into lined up spears. The story goes that one day Genghis Kahn looked down at the skull his was about to throw and realised that he had wasted most of his life. A short while later the game disappeared from history and the Province of Khwarizm was completely obliterated. The game must have survived somewhat though, because it later on re-appeared in the USA in the form of ten pin bowling.
Now you may wonder what this has to do with bowling being awful, but the observations that Genghis Kahn made 800 years ago still ring true today. Bowling is a waste of time. To prove it, take your typical amateur bowling game...
Frame 1: Ball goes in gutter both times. You make a half hearted joke about how great you are. You sit down and wait another five minutes for your turn.
Frame 2: Ball goes in gutter once and hits between one and three balls once. You make another joke about how great you are, sit down and wait five minutes.
Frame 3: At this point you're starting to worry because your reputation as a man is at stake. You score exactly what you did last time. Wait five minutes.
Frame 4: Increasingly worried, you bowl again, this time you get a grand total of nine, one short of a strike. You feel slightly smug.
Frame 5: You realise that you have to beat nine this time or you'll look a fool. So you bowl again. A grand total of four this time. Wait five minutes.
Frame 6: You bowl again, this time you've given up all hope of ever getting anything. You get a half strike. Feeling relieved for all of 30 seconds you sit down and wait for five minutes wondering how you are going to top that.
Frame 7: You realised that all your points from the first ball will be doubled. You get nothing on the first ball, and eight on the second. Five minutes.
Frame 8: You get a strike! The happiest moment of your brief bowling career is short lived though as you realise that now you are only five points behind the leader. If you get a strike again next time, then you'll become the leader. You spend the next five minutes worrying about whether or not you can get a strike.
Frame 9: You gutter it twice. Cry for five minutes.
Frame 10: You get a nine and a one, giving you an extra free ball which you promptly gutter. You end up last by three points.
And once all that is done, you repeat it all again! And those are the highs and lows of someone who is rubbish at bowling! For those good at it, it's even more boring. I once saw on blue peter a guy who could get a strike every single time he bowled. How boring must that be? What is the point in bowling if you know every time you are going to score a perfect 300? How dull must his life be?
(8) Turin Brakes - 72
(t) Graham
The score is irrelevant, the point is, it's boring.
But you only find it boring because you're rubbish. Its a social activity, meant to be played while having fun with friends not sitting on you're own for 5 minutes getting bored. oh and two pixies tickets at Brixton acadamy on ebay for 150 pounds. Why did no-one tell me they were going on sale when they did???
but let's look at the other options for american pastimes:
baseball
wrestling (in at least 8 forms)
american football (or gridiron though NO-ONE calls it that)
and nudity during various half-time performances
bowling sits pretty highly among them
whaa? bowling is great fun! looks like you arent being invited to our bowling session at megabowl this holidays! hehe
If you have a level of skill between being no good and being perfect, then it's fun.
I like bowling.
My point remains though, at no point is the game at any level entertaining. All amusement is derived from the time in between your goes when you talk to your friends. The actual 'game' bit of it is just an exercise in frustration.
And as for other American sports, Baseball, Basketball and Ice Hockey are all good. American Football though, is a subject so awful it needs it's own website. www.americanfootballsucks.com anyone?
american football = rugby for wimps
and the whole bowling thing - is this speaking from personal experience? bowling is great [with the bumpers up... they've managed to wrongly bowled balls look a lot less demoralising now :)]
it's always classic when you bowl a game with the bumpers up and they all go straight down the middle.
so next time you play, you take the bumpers down and EVERY ball goes down the gutter.
American football is actualy a very entertaining sport, and more like "the rugby of 2morro". More tactical than rugers as im sure you have all seen the "plays" that coaches make.
American football is actually a pretty good game once you understand the many rules.
Went bowling today and got 91 & 100. And you do get fun from actually bowling, especially if you can laugh at yourself, eg when you gutter ball twice after a strike :)
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Benjamin
To get between 54 and 58 as your commentary indicates, you must be REALLY bad...