i am sparticus: Travelling Home Post Christmas

Travelling Home Post Christmas

I like the railway. I really do. People often talk about how exciting it is to look down out of a plane and see the world as little dots and lines, but rarely does anyone talk about how exciting it is to see the world up close as big objects. I will though! Staring at dots isn't that fun! Seeing things close up at high speed is! I'm on the train right now and I just saw a fox! A FOX! You could try and see a fox from a plane, but even if you could, how would you make it out from the sheep around him? Or the person nearby? Or the countless other things that are to you, mr. plane flying person, dots?

So, it was with very little trepidation that I went to my grandma's local train station to get a train home. I'd rung up the national rail enquiries service earlier in the week and they'd informed me that I'd be able to get a train from the station direct to Reading, and then from Reading to Swansea. On arriving at the station I was informed by a guard that the national rail enquiries service doesn't take into account either bank holidays or rail maintenance. Apparently this happens quite often as the call centre is in India and people keep on forgetting to tell them about things like bank holidays, rail maintence time tables and office Christmas parties. Still, at least they're polite and can hold a decent conversation about Eastenders. Train Viewing Update COWS GRAZING IN THE FIELDS! A FARMER ON HIS TRACTOR! So I was left with two options. I could either take the rail replacement bus to the next station down the line, wait half an hour or so, get the train to reading and go from there or I could get a train to Birmingham and then go back down via Bristol. In case you're wondering how you decide these things, here's how I did it.
Me: Hey, of these two options which one will get me to Swansea the quickest?
Train Conductor: Well the Birmingham route is significantly faster, although you will arrive at New Street 5 minutes before the other train leaves, so of course if this train is late you'll miss it and that means a three hour wait. That and the fact that the line is notoriously problematic for delays and that in the time you've spent talking to me the train to Birmingham has left the station leaves you with only the bus option.
Me: Thanks.
Train Viewing Update FREE WI-FI OUTSIDE OF BATH! 25 SECONDS IN WHICH TO CHECK YOUR E-MAIL!! (you have none).

So I go to the bus and the bus driver tells me not to bother putting my bags in the below bus storage as it won't get too crowded. Ten minutes later and I'm rearranging bags to make room for someone else. The bus sets off full of unhappy squashed-up people. Half way through the journey part of the ceiling falls off.

Finally, I get to Swansea. Obviously all the buses are slacking off because it's a bank holiday, however it's the first Monday after Christmas so town's still full of people all of whom are carrying huge NEXT bags (which all contains clothes they'll never wear but, Hey! They were half price!! HALF PRICE!). I give up trying to find a bus going home that has any room on it and instead get a taxi. Within a minute the taxi driver has assumed I'm a football fan and is trying to find out my opinion of the Swans hopes this season. This needs to stop happening to me.