I Am The Very Model Of A Modern Major General

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Today I paid the price for letting myself be roped in to help at my Church's holiday club, in that I actually had to help. Apparently I have amazing talents at working with kids, or they were short staffed. One of the two. The good thing though, was that it was themed around pirates, and as we all know PIRATES ARE COOL, though not as cool as Ninjas. I did try and make the most of my critically acclaimed 8th Grade drama performance as the Modern Major General, though unfortunately no-one seemed to care and I didn't feel like pressing my point. However, if I had pressed my point and made them listen, I imagine this entry would read something more like this:

"...and so I got to impress people with my recital of the first three verses of 'The Modern Major General' off 'The Pirates Of Penzance'. I say impress, what I mean is that people looked at me oddly and went 'what's a general got to do with Pirates?' to which I replied 'Pirates? Sorry, I thought you said pilots!'. And then I realised if they didn't know who the modern major general was they wouldn't get that joke. Then they stabbed me violently with a cutlass and I died."

And the lessons we can learn from this are, people's knowledge of classical British comedy post-operas is shockingly poor, kid's clubs at churches are at least as violent as church football leagues and critically acclaimed 8th Grade drama performances are only critically acclaimed at the time, and generally speaking only by your English teacher and your mum.

Right Now

(8) JCB - Nizlopi ("My Dad's B.A. Barracus, with a JCB and Bruce Lee's Nunchukas")


Your Comments

Paul

8th Grade mark? 8th Grade?

That doesn't mean anything, unles you're foreign, or worse, American.

I'll come back and complain about the rest of your post later, when it's less stupid o'clock.

Kerron

You are beginning to scare me. I tend to dress up as a pirate (when fancy dress is called for - not just randomly at home!) - http://kerroncross.blogspot.com/2005/10/borat-goes-to-bristol.html

Not for holiday clubs though. That would just be odd. ;-)

My favourite G&S production is The Pirates of Penzance. The film version with Kevin Kline and Linda Ronstadt is one of the best films I've seen. Very funny!

If you like the Modern Major General Song and politics then check this link out - http://eclectech.co.uk/clarkeidcards.php - don't necessarily agree with the content, but it is funny!

:-)

Kerron

PS On the whole numbering of classes at school, I was always very confused by all this.

When I was at school I went from the 4th year, to year 11, then into the lower 6th.

And you wonder why are children are messed up???

;-)

Sparticus

I was in an American school for 5th to 8th Grade (that's year 6 through 9)

Gareth

Mark, Kerron....stop flirting


Kerron....i expected it from you...politician and all

but Mark....i'm shocked at you!!

Gareth

How bored at work am i that i'm now resorting to accusing Mark and Kerron of flirting!?!

Hayles

v.bored

Paul

Surely you would have been learning american then, not English.

the real Phil Brown (attempt 2)

Down with the class system! Anarchy rules! (heh heh heh)

Kerron

"I was in an American school for 5th to 8th Grade (that’s year 6 through 9)"

Can Americans not count either? ;-)

And does it mean we can put all their societal problems down to the fact they have a screwed up class numbering system?

PS As desperate as I may or may not be, I'd prefer it if Mark didn't flirt with me - all things considered! :-)

Kev

I don't care. So there.

Paul

You DO care Kev, you hate it when other people flirt with Kerron.

Gareth

Kev, just ask Kerron out and get it over with!!

and Kerron, Kev may not be a lady but he is a christian!?!

Kerron

Half right. But probably the half I wouldn't ever compromise on, if I'm being honest. :-)

Kev

Im a lady.

Gareth

Corse you are Kev!

Live the Dream!


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