Find Me A Job

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So apparently in 6 or so months I'll be a fully qualified degree'ed up youth worker, and with this new found power and/or responsibility comes naff all in the way of getting free money off the government. What's that about? Haven't I given enough already? So apparently I need to get a job and earn some money. This is not terrible lost as I'm guessing early retirement would bore me, but this does raise the issue of actually getting a job. Doing a job I'm not to worried about, seeing as I've been doing a job for the last four years of my life, but to do a job it turns out you have to have a job, andto have a job you need to go out and get one. Something I have very little experience of. Therefore, I figure I can finally put this website to good use. You people surely know people interesting in employing a hip young youth worker. I surely know I can at least pretend to do the job! Everyone's a winner!

Here's the deal then. I'm a qualified youth worker with good references and a witty website in look of work. You find me some sort of job you think I'd be good at and if I end up in said job, everytime I mention it on this website I'll call it "The Job That XXXXX Got Me". I'll even point xxxxx to a hyperlink of your choice! Bargain.

And just to show I'm as good as described, here are some quotes from some young people about me:

"He's cool, seriously, like everytime I see him I go, GOSH, he's cool. How can I be more like him" - Stephanopolis, 14
"Whenever he speaks to me I seriously re-evaluate my life. Without him I'd be taking crack through my eyeballs while living in a box on the streets. Now I'm picking up my third degree from Oxford" Jerry, 12
"When he told me about Jesus it felt like I was being washed clean there and then. I can't express it in words, but it blew my mind. Seriously. I'd follow Mark to the grave. I mean Jesus. Yeah." Orthobert, 15
"Ever since I spoke to Mark I've never sinned." Natashasha, 17

For child protection reasons all names, ages and quotes have been changed.

Right Now

(8) Sufjan Stevens - Come on feel the Illinoise! (that's right, this post took me an entire album)


Your Comments

Doug

Mark, if I came to Europe would you make a special effort to teach me about Jesus in a pub?

Because I might do so sometime next year.

the real Phil Brown

Yay! Jesus in a pub! Finally back where he belongs!

Sparticus

YES!

Gareth

I knew i was doing something right!

Paul

From those quotes, I'd say that you may be some form of messiah type. Have a look in the job section under 'm'.

Gareth

As we've discussed before Paul piece, there is only one Messiah and that is my Lord and Saviour (and yours) Jesus Christ!

Paul

Of course Gareth! How silly of me.

Maybe mark is a pagan holy-man type then?

Gareth

Mark is the Anti-Christ?

Sparticus

Stop arguing, start finding me a job!

Also, the position of anti-Christ has very little long-term prospects.

Gareth

But you do get a time share in the holiday home of a fiery lake of sulphur

the real Phil Brown

Wow, wow wow... Not so short-term... I mean, there's still eternal accomodation on offer, it's just not in the non-smoking section...

Also try under 'B' for Beast... Incidentally, could Antichrist come from Lebanon..?

Sparticus

Ahhhh, the Anti-Christ, now that's a topic for a rainy day.

Good thing Suffolk's a dry county.

the real Phil Brown

...nar, let's wait 'til it hails...

the real Phil Brown

Find me accomodation.
House/flat/room/floorspace/cupboard-under-the-stairs wanted for small, scarred magic boy. Well, not quite. If anyone's offering cheap accomodation/ideas in the Ipswich area for, say, the next academic year - do let me know. Phil (therealphilbrown@gmail.com)

Hang on, how many people read this website again..?

Matthew

Suffolk? Dry? I thought you said there were pubs?

Okay, bad joke. I apologise. It's been a long day.

Paul

That wasn't a joke.

It was just some words...

the real Phil Brown

your face is a joke

Gareth

You tell him Phil!

Paul

At least it's funny, rather than tragic...

the real Phil Brown

your face is magic

Paul

I'm delighted it's not pelagic.


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