The entire interweb must have thought of this idea already and blogged it to death, but in line with the Secret Diary of Steve Jobs, imagine, just for a minute if Rowan Williams had a diary:
Apparently Manchester Cathedral are throwing a hissy fit because the Cathedral is featured as a battle scene in a new computer game. Why do I employ these people? They're having a moan because they get to run around an virtual imitation of their workplace and blow stuff up? What kind of people don't want to blow up where they work? I swear, the second they release one of these games featuring Lambeth Palace, I'm there with a double-barrelled shotgun.
Or something along those lines. With a few quotes from ancient greek tragedies thrown in. In Latin.
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Matthew
If FRW ever appears I'll be comparing your style of writing closely...